What? Scorpions? Here? No. You're kidding. Really?

I just got back from a party at my TA, Asuman's, apartment near campus. It was on the top floor of her building, and her view is probably the best view of the city that I've seen yet. For those of you familiar with the layout of the area (Michelle), her building is right behind the mosque, and just past the North Campus. Basically right behind the photocopy place. Of course I forgot my camera, because I am a fucking idiot. She cancelled our conversation hour today so that she and Didem, the TA for the other Advanced class, could make food for all of us. And boy, was there food. We're talking real delicious homemade Turkish cuisine. Mercimek köftesi, melons, potato salad (imagine a healthy version), etsiz çiğ köfte, watermelon, chips, and cheeses. Tons of it. Everyone brought something to drink, too, so there was plenty of beer, wine, and rakı. There were about 18 people there at the party's peak, all on her incredibly comfortable and spacious balcony overlooking the European side of the city, with a view stretching from the first bridge all the way north to Şişli and beyond. 

As we approached her building, down a narrow alley, there were some younger girls hanging out in front of the door. I was carrying what must have been a 20 pound watermelon in one hand and a bag full of beer in the other, and lifted the watermelon up to ring the doorbell. They heard me speak Turkish and started laughing uncontrollably. Can't blame them, it's fucking absurd. 

I really like hanging out with the people in my class and the other advanced class. Everyone is really interesting and has a lot to contribute. This, of course, was made even more incredible by the presence of rugs on the patio, along with pillows and a hookah and a beautiful sunset. Asuman even brought out her reed flute and played a bit for us. I practiced my Japanese skills with Shiho and Tokiko, and of course the Turkish was everywhere. It was a really great evening. Murat also told me about this Iranian folk hero who represents strength because during the martyrdom of Ali, he had an arm cut off while carrying something heavy, so he switched the heavy thing he was carrying to his other arm. They cut that off, so he put it on his head, and then they cut his head off. This really upset the guy's kid, and lots of stuff ensued, but önemli olarak bir tartışma mı olacak? Biz henuz bilmiyorduk. 

Evet. 

However, upon leaving, Asuman told me that the doorway to the attic, located just above the front door to her place (which is like a palace compared to mine, and probably half the price), is "where we put akrepler." They have found 6 akrepler this summer so far. "Akrep ne demek?" I asked, like an idiot. It means scorpion. Yeah, she has scorpions in her building. Unless she is joking, which for some reason I doubt, she said the last one they found was on her bed and was three and a half inches long. They have the equivalent of mothballs for scorpions in their landings. I about shit. I spent the weekend in Cappadochia and saw no scorpions whatsoever. Now I find out they were all waiting here for me. WTF. No. If I see one, it is dead. Dead with a pocket knife in its back. I don't care where it is or when. Stab. Fuck that. No patience for the wicked.

Interestingly enough, the hands of a clock are called "scorpions," possibly because they look like its tail. I have mentioned my feelings of scorpions before, but in case you missed it, they are awful. Just awful. No thank you. 

Now I have to sleep in my shitty dorm with paper thin walls and hope to God a scorpion doesn't land on me. 

Next time we do it, everyone will bring food and drink. Homumuza gitti. Tamam o zaman öbür tarafa gideceksiniz. Iyi Şanslar! Daha iyi olacak. 

It is clearly bedtime, so I bid you all adieu. Goodnight!